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Vrouw moe. Vrouw gefrustreerd.
never good enough

Always tired and frustrated

be kind to yourself
Vrouw moe. Vrouw gefrustreerd.
Never good enough

Always tired and frustrated

be kind to yourself
NEVER GOOD ENOUGH

Always tired and frustrated

BE KIND TO YOURSELF

Never good enough

Do you recognize the feeling that whatever you do is never enough? Your achievements at home, at school, or at work? Do you regularly get exhausted from what you do, and do you never seem to find real satisfaction in achieving goals? Then please read on. 

Running too fast 

Because what I found out recently is that most of my destructive behavior patterns have to do with low self-esteem. Because of this low self-image, I run very fast. I’m going to do my ultimate best to feel good about myself. As a result, I start things, run too fast, and give up exhausted.

Do you recognize this? 

All your work has to be perfect, you don’t settle for less 
You have to achieve for yourself 
You can’t make mistakes 
You suffer from performance anxiety 
You are exhausted from all your hard work 

Self-destructive structural behavior  

Because I am always busy with wanting to win, having to achieve (see my blogs about fear of failure and stress), but also regularly fail and my perfectionist self not being happy, I keep up a self-destructive pattern. Because when I feel like I’m failing, it again affects my self-image.

Over-performing for a good feeling 

To give you an example, after just 2 months of being a mom, and was still recovering from stitches, extreme tiredness, had a lot of problems with my hormones, and was constantly stressed because I can’t stand crying – even then I couldn’t resist getting back to my study books. I wanted to get back on track as soon as possible. Perform at work. Feeling good about myself. And besides that, I was extremely focused on housekeeping. Everything had to be spic and span. Everything had to be perfectly clean, because: I wanted to feel good about myself. You hardly saw me in bed, recovering from childbirth or from the broken nights. 

Always tired, always frustrated 

But what did this hard work bring me? I didn’t enjoy my leave, because my mind was already back at work. And as for the cleaning: I never got the job done! What frustration. Another failure (in my opinion). So with this achievement, I could not increase or maintain my sense of self-worth. 

Also, I had little sense of satisfaction when my goals were achieved because when the goal was achieved, I already had a new goal. As a result, I ended up exhausted again. Because it was never good enough. 

I have found out that wanting to achieve in this way, performing in order to feel good about myself, exhausts and never brings satisfaction or a better self-image in the longer term. 

More self-esteem, more self-confidence 

A book from the author Christine Wilding “How to Deal with Low Self-Esteem“, showed me that creating more self-esteem, practicing self-love, is an answer to increase your self-confidence. So I want to get started as soon as possible! 

But before I do that, I will start with the following exercise (out of my own initiative): saying affirmations aloud daily: 

# 1. Start with daily affirmations (speak out to yourself) 

I’m allowed to be here; 

I’m worth it; 

I am not perfect; 

I can make mistakes; 

I am worth as much as anyone else; 

I can make as many mistakes as anyone else; 

I only allow self-judgment if it is positive; 

I’m okay even if I just fail; 

I don’t have to perform to be seen; 

I don’t have to perform to be loved; 

I am loved; 

I can just be. 

Did you manage to say this out loud to yourself? We must believe these positive affirmations are true. And the only way to start believing in them, is to say it repeadetly to ourselves. So we can get rid of all the negative symptoms of a low self-esteem, such as such as performance anxiety, perfectionism, and exhaustion. And ultimately go through life with more self-confidence. 

# 2. Get started with the book

Get rid of performance anxiety and perfectionism! We can do this!

Love, 

Stella 

Christine Wilding - How to deal with Low Self Esteem

Do you also want more self-confidence?

Then read with me! I would love it if you post your review of the book below this article. The person who posts his review first will receive a present from me! You can buy the book via the link below (if you do it via that link, I earn a little bit on it, without you paying anything extra for it). The only condition is that you must be able to provide proof of payment for your bol.com purchase after you have made the purchase via this link. Will you read it with me?

Then together we will go on the road to more self-confidence.

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Stella has spent more than half of her life searching for PEACE and continues to do so every day. What she learned along the way, through trial and error, she shares with you in her open-hearted blogs.

Jou een leuke en nuttige leeservaring geven: met die intentie schrijf ik mijn blogs. Maar voor niets gaat de zon op; het onderhouden van deze website kost geld. In mijn blogs maak ik daarom regelmatig gebruik van affliate links, voor de promotie van artikelen of belevenissen. Als je via zo’n link iets koopt, krijg ik een kleine vergoeding. Zo kan ik jou wekelijks voorzien van nieuwe Inspiratie op het gebied van Rust, Zelfvertrouwen of Blijdschap. 

To give you a fun and useful reading experience: with that intention, I write my blogs. But there’s no such thing as a free lunch; maintaining this website costs money. That is why I regularly use affiliate links in my blogs to promote articles or experiences. If you buy something via such a link, I will receive a small fee and it will cost you nothing. This way I can provide you with new Inspiration in the field of Peace, Self-confidence, or Happiness.

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